Hello peeps, I hope that your week is going well and wonderful. Let me be real with you guys, I have a problem that needs fixing. I can’t seem to talk to any guy that I have a crush on. It is ironic because I am a very charismatic person. Being able to carryout a conversation with almost anyone is definitely one of my better qualities. However that quality just disappears in to the abyss whenever I’m around someone I like. Ever since I was little, most of my friends have been girls. The first friend I ever made was a girl named Katie, we met at the rug and bonded over my Pochacco ( the little dog from Hello Kitty lol). From then on I have always had a way with the ladies, you could go as far as calling me the straight girl whisperer. Those girls who need someone to cheer them up and tell them how beautiful they are.
Whenever I’m out and about there is something that pulls me to talk to the girl next to me. We immediately click and she tells me her life long story and all her deepest darkest secrets. I am so grateful that they feel like can open up to me, but sometimes during these conversations my brain distracted by a beautiful man passing by. I think to myself why can’t that man be the one talking to me. At times I feel like there is some evil princess from the North trying to punish me. I find it a lot easier to talk to girls because they are more open about things and they seem a lot more friendly (well some of them are).
I feel that it is hard for me to talk to guys because when I was younger I was bullied by my male peers due to me channeling my inner diva/princess. They would make fun of about how girly I acted and it made me feel like I wasn’t “boy enough” to fit in their inner circle of kick ball and PowerRangers.
So instead I confided with girls. They were able to understand where I was coming from (well a lot of them did, some of them were little bitches). I eventually did get over this fear making friends with guys, but in the back of my I still have my guard up.
At this point I don’t know what to do. I feel like this desperate Chihuahua dog barking for its dear little life. Since I am surrounded by mostly women, I feel like hanging out with more guys would remedy this horrendous curse of anxiety around men (me laughing really hard). I want to find a role model, a man or a woman, that is a dominant figure to show me how to be more assertive so that I can approach a man. I want to find my inner Al Pacino. I want to learn how to be the alpha (whatever that means). By being more confident I will be able to be comfortable talking to and approaching any man on the planet whether gay, straight, ect.
I feel like this week when I had an opportunity to talk to Pie, but I froze up again. The minute I saw his face I completely froze and I did the Tyra Banks stare and walked away. Ugh!!!! This is exactly why I need to build up my confidence!
Now that I know what I have to do, I must put my straight girl whispering powers on hold and build my confidence to talk to more guys. In the comments bellow let me know how you guys approach a person of interest to you! Love you, Pechuka’s!!!!! 🙂